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The Pirate Movie (1982)
Desperately In Need OF A Region 1 Wide.Screen DVD
I am stunned by how many positive reveiws I am seeing here. This movie was a lazy mix of washed up 1970's teen talent, leftovers from The Pirates of Penzance and an Olivia Newton John album. Well, I take back that last part...Olivia Newton John actually made music that was considered good and got radio play.
The comedy "tone" the filmakers were shooting for was something on the level of Bugs Bunny or Blazing Saddles. Instead we get actors looking into the camera and trying to be cute, enough homosexual references to make it NOT okay for the kids it was supposed to aimed at, and unexplained set pieces that exist just to give the actors something to play with. Why would there be a magician's false bottom coffin prominently displayed in the home of a wealthy governor? To top all of this off, we have backhanded references to Star Wars and Indiana Jones that merely make you wish you were watching one of those movie instead of this one.
In one scene Chris watches Kristie strip down and says, "I've never seen a woman like that before". To which she replies-"Hey, the body is an eight, but the mind is a ten!".
This is the best written dialogue in the whole movie, it's that bad.
The Happy Ending song did make me happy because it meant the movie was over. But then I was sad again because they played it during the final dance sequence...and then again during the
unexplained present day ending (are they married now?), and yet again during the credits. But hey, it's Kristy's dream! She can do what she wants...except make this turkey a good movie.
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